It’s no secret that cell reception at Wrigley has a tendency to suck. So a lot of what I wanted to tweet last night during the game, I didn’t get to because…well…I couldn’t. Which means my loyal fans missed all of my wit and whatnot (mostly whatnot).
Here’s everything I wanted to tweet last night, but couldn’t.
-Narrowly avoided contact with Ronnie Woo Woo and his blue ukelele. I used a human shield.
-Judging by the fans in Brewers jersies, there’s only 3 players on their team. Weeks, Fielder, and Braun. Lots of Braun.
-Either Tony Campana is the bat boy, or the bat boy wants to be him. 90mph everywhere.
-Favorite Braun taunt: “Get your hair cut!” Hilariously random.
-Favorite Braun taunt: A ten year old accusing Braun of wearing his sister’s pants.
-Favorite Braun taunt: A man with a very deep voice telling Braun he had the nicest ass in the NL. We all felt a little dirty after that.
-I may have eaten a helmet of ice cream for dinner.
-Randy Well’s butt isn’t nearly as big in person as it is on TV. But it’s still a bit of junk in that trunk.
-Soriano is adorable with the left field fans.
-I bet these girls trying to get balls from the players are really good at getting beads during Mardi Gras.
-If I were skinny and pretty with no shame, I bet I could get a lot of balls, too. #SeeWhatIDidThere
-The Braun fans in left field are far too impressed by Braun making routine catches.
-There are so many drunken, floppy rally hats right now.
-3 dollar beer night in the bleachers isn’t a good idea if you’re not drinking the 3 dollar beers. #SoManyUnfunnyDrunks
-Your best bet for a non-dickhead Brewers fan? Find one wearing a Gallardo jersey.
-Park and ride is great, but they have to shove 750 people on the bus back to the lot.
-I am unskilled at strap hanging on a packed bus. I’m going to need Tommy John surgery after this ride.
Okay, the last three were on the bus, but I couldn’t tweet them because I didn’t have the opportunity as I was hanging on for dear life and trying not to kill the cool Brewers fans next to me.
It was my last Cubs game of the season, a bittersweet moment for me. I went to Wrigley more times this year than I have in my life. Of my three trips, I only got one win. But win or lose, I love going to Wrigley.
I can’t wait for next year.